Drivers to spend that extra ten minutes abusing traffic wardens
Drivers have welcomed the introduction of a new ten-minute parking leeway rule and say they will use it to make V-signs and generally being abusive to traffic wardens. ‘Fantastic news,’ said London...
View ArticleShit parking ‘OK’ with hazard lights says council
Cheshire County Council have issued an apology to local resident Peter King after he recently got a ticket for bad parking even though he had his hazard warning lights on. ‘We regret this incident...
View ArticleLincolshire Council have pencil sharpeners hacked
“It happened very quickly, probably overnight, within a week at most,” said councillor James Bellingham today about the repeated hacks that have resulted in the council being ransomed for “£1 million...
View ArticleHazard lights renamed ‘parking like a twat’ button
New Ministry of Transport guidelines will see the hazard light feature on car dashboards renamed ‘park like an inconsiderate arsewipe’ or ‘the do-whatever the feck you like’ button. The hazard light...
View ArticleShock as ‘gap’ in Waitrose car park turns out to be small car parked straight
Henrietta Rawlinson, 43, from Cheltenham, has reported her severe discombobulation after steering her Land Rover Discovery into the back of a Skoda Fabia in the car park at Waitrose this morning on the...
View Article“Disabled parking space” to be new unit of measurement for BMW cars
The German car manufacturer has announced that the size of each of its models will henceforth be calibrated in DPS, or the number of disabled parking spaces needed to accommodate it. Sizes will range...
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